I am loosing my head now.

If If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies, Or, being hated, don't give way to hating, And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise; If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with triumph and disaster And treat those two imposters just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools; If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breath a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on"; If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch; If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds' worth of distance run - Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son! -------------------------------------------------- I am loosing my cool when the words of man attack my mind again. Sigh. I want to get over it but the more I want to get over it the more I could not.

Sins of tongue

The Overused tongue

Ecclesiastes 5:3 says that "a fool's voice is known by multitude of words." People think they appear smart by much talking, but the Bible states just the opposite. Ecclesiastes 5:2 says, "Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not thine heart be hasty to utter any thing before God: for God is in heaven, and thou upon earth: therefore let thy words be few." God doesn't like a blabber mouth.

The Backbiter tougue

Proverbs 25:23 and Romans 1:30 make mention of a backbiting tongue. A backbiter is someone who uses their tongue against you when you aren't present, yet they will not face you with their charges when you are present. This is a cowardly backbiter who would rather stir up problems than solve problems.

A backbiter would much rather talk ABOUT the preacher than talk TO the preacher. A backbiter would much rather talk ABOUT some weak Christian in the church than offer some words of encouragement TO them. A backbiter is of no use to anyone, and no one has ever been strengthened or edified through backbiting. Beware of the backbiters, especially the ones who sow discord among brethren (Pro. 6:19)!

I was upset when his tongue backbite me. I was angry and hurt like any other human.

But, I tell myself I don't want to be anyone else other than myself. I am not bound to any form of his standard. There is a teaching from SuperCamp that says 'The rejector is actually the one being rejected'. Not only that, bible tells me that the tongue is the 'deadly posion' that kills us.

There is another saying 'the mouth is on his face, you can't control him from saying anything.'

I have decided to let God heals me and deal with it. He is the rejector and he will still get the rejection.

Being different

So, what if I am different. Who are you to judge me?

Judging me shows that how lack of confidence you are and how low your self esteem is.

It has been a habit that your mouth blackmail and gossip about others. It has been a habit until the lies in your mouth blind you to make you think that you are doing great things.

I pray God has mercy on you to show you the right way to behave.

You need a life.

-------------------------------------Penang--------------------------------------------------
Everyone here needs a life to move on.

Tradition reflects your identity but it brings you to no further and no direction.

To hold it with you will drown you. Wake up and have a hobby or a life.

I weep when I know traditions tear you apart from God who loves you so much.

I pray God shakes the island to wake you up.

Stubborn. Proud. Stubborn and proud.

It is so rich. Full of heritage and language. But the monoply continues to monopollizes and the labourers continue to labour til the end of life.

I pray God shows mercy on you.

Mini Skirt scandals

Watched the movie again. It left me thinking. I am still satisfied with the acting especially the coy face of the actress and her emotions in the movie. I just cannot express it and wonder how she could portray such emotion. She is a real professional actress.

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Today I wore a mini skirt to a school. I kind of forgot that we were heading to the school as my mind was thinking and feeling that today is my OFF DAY!

When I arrived in the school. All the memories about teaching practice came back and I felt that I was once again a secondary school teacher.

'Don't judge the book by its cover.' 'The Inner beauty is the ...' I heard them saying their chorus speaking from outside.

The next thing I get was a rejection from the school simply because I carelessly forgot that I needed to come to the school first before going to Ikea. Kee Aun, thank you for helping me and stand by my side.

I was speechless and bit pissed off. I came to help the students but there was not even a thank you. No payment at all. That hours we could have done so many other things but we want to help the students that is why we feel happy to go. *DAMN POTONG STEAM* =.=

But, I tell myself it is ok. They judged me by the book cover is just human nature. Some more, I was at their territory. I know what I am doing and who I am. It is ok though I had to stay and 'hide' for most of the time to avoid letting the teacher coming back again to tell me to leave the school.

Most of all, I still enjoyed the trip all the way to the school and the hours spent with the student to help them out with their Chorus Speaking. Finger crossed - NO REGRET!


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I am just a sinner who is by God's grace I am saved and loved dearly. I still make mistakes. I still can't get up early to be a discipline good role model. Sometimes, I sinned accidentally - told some white lies before too - don't ask me why and when.

It is by God's grace my life is still good to go. Thank you God for Your faithfulness.

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I am very excited tomorrow I am going to work. Thank God for all He gives because He provides.

regret

I moved house today. I screwed up things I feel. It happened because of some mistakes and some miscommunication. I regretted deeply. No one could understand the regrets I feel. Sorrow knocking my head and heart. Anxiety hits me deeply.

I never experience such silly mistake. I am always aware of what is going on. It is not pride but don't know why I made silly mistake like this. I deeply regret and no words but sorry to the people I cause trouble.

I hope that bad things happen for good. I hope God bless this mistake to be a double opportunity for better things.

------------ I am real sorry for a silly mistake like this, I tell myself I will not do it again. ------------